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Ashley Soto ’11

On April 4, 1990, in El Paso, Texas, a baby had to be removed from her mother’s womb because of the excruciating pain that derives from a fetus dancing wildly in utero.Thus was born Ashley Soto, and a year later, she found herself at Amherst College, where she is majoring in Neuroscience and will become a doctor specializing in remedying awkward silences and Monday morning blues.

If you don’t know Ashley personally, you can recognize her as she whose constant smile actually blocks out the sun. One day the sun was like, “Yo gimme back my followers, they love you more than me” and Ashley was all like, “no!” and then the sun was like, “okay” and was happy again and then Ashley giggled loudly.

Most recently, the very talented Ashley was contacted by the Intergalactic Music Awards representatives who wanted her to sing some Beyonce at their upcoming LaLaLand Festival and spread the wonder of her soulful, velvety, improvisatory voice across the universe and thus bring peace.

On her days off from the DQ, Ashley spends most of her time napping, dancing and choreographing with DASAC, or saving lives with ACEMS, and has of late been working on a way to combine the three in a method that is still too secret to be talked about openly.