The DQ of Amherst College

Breanna Richards ’21

Breanna Richards is excited to be joining Amherst College’s DQ! Breanna is a member of the class of 2021, sings Soprano, and can count to one-hundred in under a minute probably. Breanna began her singing career early in high school. However, half way through her sophomore year disaster struck when she was unjustly framed for regicide. The king of the land had made many enemies in his long career. He was not a tyrannous king though, in fact he was well loved by the peasants for he was charitable and kind and most of all honorable. In fact, he was honorable to a fault. His strict moral compass did not sit well with many of the noblemen of the kingdom who had grown accustomed to a profitably corrupt governing system. Thus, in the dead of night the noblemen hatch an ignoble plot: assassination. Breanna was simple caught at the wrong place at the wrong time.

While having only just started singing, word quickly spread of the girl with the voice of an angel. When the King heard the news he immediately summoned her to see if the claims were true. As she stood in the throne room warbling a miraculously beautiful tune, the noblemen realized this was their opportunity. Breanna’s voice was so beautiful and enthralling that the king and his guards had dropped their guard and were settling down to take a nap. Then like Caesar, the Noblemen cut down the king. Of course, the Noblemen, being slimy and unopposed to lies and deceit, pinned the regicide on the innocent Breanna.

Rather then be captured however Breanna managed just barley to escape, and went into exile. Additionally, her favorite Disney movie is Frozen. Breanna, knowing she had no future here in the kingdom where she was labeled at a traitorous murderer, stowed away on a ship bound for the far-off desert land to the west. Once she arrived, she realized she had nothing left; she had left her entire life behind. She began to wander the desert in search of a new purpose. Night after night she would meet weary travelers on the road and in exchange for food water and a bed for the night, Breanna would use her sweet songbird voice to melt away the traveler’s worries. However, the desert is not a friendly place. It was just a matter of time until she encountered the deadly desert raiders. The raiders however only wanted money which Breanna of course had none of. Quizzical, the raiders asked how she had survived so long in the desert with no money to trade with. Breanna told them all about the almost magical beauty of her voice. The raiders of course demanded she show them her skill. Breanna could tell this pack of raiders were a violent and impatient bunch, just looking for an excuse to kill. So, with all her energy and grace Breanna sang the most beautiful moment in music there ever was; a song so sweet and powerful the raider’s hearts grew three sizes. Seeing the error of their ways, the raiders threw down their weapons to the sand. Having received such a beautiful performance, the raiders asked Breanna what they could possibly do to repay her. She knew exactly what to request.

In the dead of night in the very same throne room the noble king once sat, the Noblemen now awkwardly sat in a circle. They could not decide among themselves who would sit upon the throne as they all lusted after power, however they were all too cunning to be deceived by one another, so they sat instead on wooden chairs bickering all day and night. Their constant squabble took up so much time the kingdom was practically in disrepair for lack of leadership. However, their rule would end that night. The throne room door slammed open as Breanna and her band of reformed raiders stormed the palace. Also, Breanna enjoys Taylor Swift among other artists. The raiders ran in with weapons drawn expecting to receive heavy resistance from the royal guard, however all the guards remembered the beauty of Breanna’s voice and could not bring themselves to attack. Breanna proudly defeated the Noblemen and threw them in prison till the end of time. Breanna would ascend to the throne herself, however, having just been accepted to Amherst college, she felt it only proper that she attend, for the college’s feeling would most likely have been hurt if she declined. It was of course only natural that she then joined the DQ.